Friday, October 24, 2008


Welcome to "The Gods Are Bored," praise and worship for the sane and sensible!

Today, as a public service, we're reprinting (in its entirety, as its author demands) a screed against Halloween by --- duuuuuh --- a put-upon Christian columnist. As usual, this poor persecuted man of faith decries the fact that Christmas can't be celebrated in schools, but Halloween can.

I will weigh in on this subject next week, but for now here's the screed. Don't blame me for how long it is. The caveat at the bottom said it had to be reprinted in full, with no editing. Done.

Ten Reasons Christians Should Not Celebrate Halloween
by J. Kerby Anderson

Many in our secular society believe Halloween is nothing more than a harmless festival that allows kids to collect candy. But is it? Its origins lie deeply rooted in the occult, and Christians should stay away. Here are ten reasons why.

1. October 31st has long been known as "The Festival of the Dead." The Celtic tribes and their priests the Druids celebrated this day as a marker for the change from life to death.

2. Halloween today is performed usually by adherents of witchcraft who use the night for their rituals. Witches celebrate Halloween as the "Feast of Samhain," the first feast of the witchcraft year. Being a festival of the dead, Halloween is a time when witches attempt to communicate with the dead through various forms of divination.

3. Christians should not be involved with occultic practice or divination. Note God's command against divination in Deuteronomy 18.

4. Occultists believe Halloween is a time of transition between life and death. Some occult practitioners practiced divination and believed you could learn the secrets of life and wisdom by Iying on a grave and listening to the messages from the long-departed.

5. Occultists also taught that spirits and ghosts left the grave during this night and would seek out warmth in their previous homes. Villagers, fearful of the possibility of being visited by the ghosts of past occupants, would dress up in costumes to scare the spirits on their way. They would also leave food and other treats at their door to appease the spirits so they would not destroy their homes or crops but instead move on down the road. That is the real reason why kids dress up in costumes today and go door-to-door seeking treats.

6. Occultists also would try to scare away the spirits by carving a scary face into a pumpkin. This horrible visage would hopefully move the spirit on to another home or village and spare that home from destruction. Sometimes the villagers would light a candle and place it within the pumpkin and use it as a lantern (hence the name, Jack-o-Lantern). This is the origin of carving pumpkins at Halloween.

7. In some witchcraft covens, the closing ritual includes eating an apple or engaging in fertility rites. In the Bible (Genesis 3), eating a piece of fruit brought sin and death into the world. In witchcraft, eating an apple is symbolic of bringing life. The practice of bobbing for apples brings together two pagan traditions: divination and the fertility ritual.

8. Schools are removing any religious significance from Christmas (often called winter break) and Easter (spring break). Isn't it ironic that most public schools still celebrate Halloween even though it has occultic origins?

9. Participating in Halloween gives sanction to a holiday that promotes witches, divination, haunted houses, and other occultic practices.

10. Christians should avoid Halloween and develop creative alternatives. Churches can hold a Fall Fun Festival and/or celebrate Reformation Day (also October 31). They should not endorse or promote Halloween.
Copyright © 2001 Probe Ministries

About the Author
Kerby Anderson is the president of Probe Ministries International. (emphasis Anne's) He received his B.S. (emphasis Anne's) from Oregon State University, M.F.S. from Yale University, and M.A. from Georgetown University. He is the author of several books, including Genetic Engineering, Origin Science, Living Ethically in the 90s, Signs of Warning, Signs of Hope, and Moral Dilemmas. He also served as general editor for Marriage, Family and Sexuality.
He is a nationally syndicated columnist whose editorials have appeared in the Dallas Morning News, the Miami Herald, the San Jose Mercury, and the Houston Post.
He is the host of "Probe," and frequently serves as guest host on "Point of View" (USA Radio Network). He can be reached via e-mail at
What is Probe?
Probe Ministries is a non-profit corporation whose mission is to reclaim the primacy of Christian thought and values in Western culture through media, education, and literature. In seeking to accomplish this mission, Probe provides perspective on the integration of the academic disciplines and historic Christianity.

In addition, Probe acts as a clearing house, communicating the results of its research to the church and society at large.

Further information about Probe's materials and ministry may be obtained by writing to:
Probe Ministries
1900 Firman Drive, Suite 100
Richardson, TX 75081(972) 480-0240 FAX(972) 644-9664


PS: It takes cheek to call your ministry "Probe" in this day and age!


mrsb said...

I guess he's not familiar with the pagan origins of MOST of the Christmas traditions?

Does he have a Christmas tree? Does he hang holly or mistletoe?

Does he let his kids believe in Santa?

Does he celebrate in December?

Heck, does he eat chocolate bunnies and hide eggs at Easter?

It really burns my butt when people bring on the whole "pagan origins, oh my!" crap.

Every Christian holiday had some pagan origins. Every one. Dude needs to do some research before he starts getting rid of Halloween!


wordwitch said...

I completely agree with the above - and just want to add that he's a very repetitive idiot...said the asme thing over and over and over...guess he couldn't think of new ways to say the same thing.

If he's got all those degrees, that all I can say is = shameful education system.

THE Michael said...

Can we print the TEN reasons sane people should not celebrate CHRISTMAS? CAN WE? Huh? Huh?

Please, PLEASE let's print our own screed....P L E A S E!!

Inanna said...

Sigh. Bored now.

SubtleKnife said...

I should've gone to the bathroom before reading that title...

And to put insult to injury, my points seem to have been made already.

Thalia Took said...

So I guess the dude doesn't celebrate Memorial Day either, huh? Since that's about the Dead and all.

Ali said...

Ummm... does Kerby here know the difference between a "list of interesting historical facts" and a "reasoned argument"?

I wonder what "Christian" justifications he could come up with for celebrating a "Fall Fun Festival", anyway? "Umm, okay kids, now we're going to bob for olives and curse fig trees never to bear fruit again... just like Jesus!"

yellowdog granny said...

sigh...mrsb said it best...and to that I just say..."fucking A"

sott'Eos said...

Shall we ponder on how Reformation Day would go over in a country that is 33% Catholic.

Raevyn said...

LOL I spent this entire article so?....well yeah!

*falls off broom*

Yvonne said...


Well I think Probe Ministries shouldn't be called that because probing sounds a bit phallic and everyone knows that the phallus is a Pagan symbol. Or is it something to do with aliens?

Anonymous said...

The Celts didn't have pumkins...they used turnips. And so do I...See you Sunday, Anne!