Shrine On, Harvest Moon

Welcome to "The Gods Are Bored!" Have you seen the Moon lately? Ever since it was full, we've enjoyed clear nights around here, and the Moon has lingered into the morning sky. Just before dawn today, it lay a silver varnish over everything, like a gentle celestial spotlight. We at "The Gods Are Bored" all hail Luna, magnificent Goddess of the Moon!

Another day, another laugh. Vent till you're spent. That's my motto.

I have a parrot named Decibel. It's an apt name. Of course, Decibel isn't my parrot's real name. I protect the ones I love by never giving their real names. Plus, Decibel's real name is totally stupid.

There's a Korean market near here. It is a real Korean market, meaning that all the groceries have Korean directions on them, and Korean names, and you can get numerous obscure Korean ingredients there. (A quick aside: If you love your cat, buy it some dried Bonito flakes, the kind used to make soup. Give kitty the flakes all dried out, straight from the bag. You will have a slave for life.)

My daughter The Heir loves the Korean market because she's into marketing, and the place is chock a block with adorable Asian food product characters. We go there so she can look for cans of shrimp where the shrimp on the label are winking and smiling at you, as if they can't wait to be consumed.

One of the items they stock at the Korean market is Parrot brand evaporated milk. Parrot brand is to evaporated milk as Nora Roberts is to fiction. In other words, the name PARROT is more pronounced than the product, evaporated milk.

If you look at a can of Parrot evaporated milk, what you think you're seeing is a can of parrot.

So I bought a can of Parrot and brought it home.

Now, when Decibel gets into one of his conniptions, I brandish the can of Parrot and threaten to bundle him off to the cannery.

It doesn't keep him quiet, but it makes me laugh. And laughter is the best medicine, next to gin and tranquilizers.