Mission Statement/ Monkey Man

Hello, and welcome to "The Gods Are Bored." Periodically we like to re-introduce ourselves to our wide and growing readership.

We are running this web site in honor of gods who once commanded respect but have since been downsized in revised head counts.

Our personal favorites are the Celtic deities - the Green Man and Queen Brighid the Bright, their attendant fairies, and the various other denizens of Sidhe, the Celtic heaven.

But we don't stop there. Believing in freedom of speech, we dedicate this open forum to the many and varied gods who deserve air time. Gods like Poseidon, Morpheus, Thor, Quetzalcotyl, Shiva, and even poor misunderstood chumps like Baal, who got a pink slip from a god named Yahweh (but only after all the internal memos were shredded).

Occasionally, when we aren't looking, a god who calls himself "Mr. Applegate" pops in and teaches us the value of hearing both sides of a story before passing judgment. Because there's always another viewpoint to every issue, unless of course you buy what you hear on conservative radio talk shows and "Fox News."

Our other agenda item here at "The Gods Are Bored" is some commentary on life in an affluent suburb of one of those big, pagan, heathen metropolises on the East Coast of the U.S.A. And since this commentary comes from a gal who grew up in Appalachia and makes her living as a goat judge, it's kind of like a foreigner's eyeball view of a whole new land. A new land with indoor plumbing, central air, and dishes that match.

So, please join us! Take a number and have a seat. Someone will help you shortly.

Today, one day late, we record two sightings of our local Monkey Man! It's always a joy to see the Monkey Man riding around on his old bicycle, with his well-worn stuffed monkey perched in the bike basket. Last week my younger daughter (I have two daughters, The Heir and The Spare) ran into the Monkey Man in the CVS Pharmacy. It happened that The Spare had a camera with her, and her friend snapped a picture of The Spare and the Monkey Man together. The Monkey Man is grinning from ear to ear. His monkey peeks from behind The Spare's shoulder.

As a dedicated mom who has once or twice had the misfortune to be stuck in a room where "Dr. Laura" was being piped in, I can't tell you how relieved I am that our local Monkey Man was so willing to have his picture taken with a cute little girl. A dude who has something to hide just ain't gonna do that.

Anyway, last night I had just gotten the pictures developed, and I ran into the Monkey Man at the grocery store! What a coincidence! I hadn't seen him or his monkey in more than a month!

I showed him the photograph and told him my daughters are "Monkey Man fans." He laughed and said it made his day. His monkey laughed too.

And then the god Shiva sent a terrible thunderstorm that threatened to blow us all to sea. If you want to read about that, scroll down.
ANNE, THE MERLIN OF BERKELEY SPRINGS