Welcome to "The Gods Are Bored!" Just this morning, I think most of the gods would rather be playing solitaire in their lonely heavens than struggling to find clean water and mosquito repellent in Mississippi.
I've got a rare blood type, so I let the Red Cross rip the ol' veins open fairly often. Yesterday, during a routine blood drive, the volunteers were talking about hurricane duty.
Oh my.
I said they could have an extra pint of blood, but they didn't take it.
Anyway, these big Atlantic hurricanes are ripping up the Southlands regularly now, and in a future post we'll talk about what hurricanes mean for hillbillies. But today's topic is a little more of the moment.
WHO'S ON GUARD?
(With apologies to Abbott and Costello)
WHO = the National Guard
WHAT = the Army Reserves
I DON'T KNOW = Dubya
Q: Who's helping the residents of Louisiana, Alabama, and Mississippi keep their houses safe from looters?
A: No, Who's in Iraq.
Q: I don't understand. Who's policing the highways so opportunistic thieves and thugs can't dash in and take advantage of ordinary Americans caught in harm's way?
A: No, sorry. Who's in Iraq.
Q: Well then, Who's in Mississippi?
A: No, Who's in Iraq.
Q: I don't get it. What's keeping criminals from taking advantage of hurricane damage to plunder and terrorize hurricane victims?
A: What's in Iraq too.
Q: What is in Iraq?
A: That's right.
Q: No, you don't understand. What exactly is in Iraq?
A: Yep.
Q: Wait. I don't get this at all. Who helps out with damage control when hurricanes strike?
A: Usually, but right now Who's in Iraq.
Q: Who's in Iraq?
A: Yep.
Q: I still don't understand. Who is in Iraq, and What's going on there?
A: That's completely correct.
Q: Well, then, who's helping the hurricane victims, and what can help them?
A: Sorry. Iraq.
Q: I don't know what you're talking about! I don't know!
A: White House.
ANNE BLAMES BLOOD LOSS FOR THIS NONSENSE
THE MERLIN OF BERKELEY SPRINGS
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