Wednesday, November 30, 2016

Donald Trump: Baby Christian

Honestly. You can't make this shit up.

My dear sister lives out in the country, and inevitably she has friends who are evangelical Christians. When she posted something against The Orange Menace on her Facebook page, one of these cockeyed morons replied:

"Yes! Donald Trump is a Christian! He's a baby Christian, but he's on his way."

EXHIBIT A: BABY CHRISTIAN


Don't know about you, but when the term "baby Christian" gets thrown around, this is the first thing I think of! Who hasn't been to one of these little ceremonies?

I suppose this is what the evangelicals are calling newly-minted charlatans converts. But when it comes to the Orange Menace, "baby" fits way better than "Christian."

An overwhelming majority of grown-up evangelical Christians supported the Orange Menace. This should forever put to rest the idea that such people are anything more than rank hypocrites. They actually flicked the "yes" switch for a womanizing, twice-divorced huckster who takes glee in stiffing his employees, plastering the world with dreary golf courses, and firing up factories in foreign lands.

EXHIBIT B: THE BUSY GOD RESPONDS

Now, this right here is the facepalm you make when everything you ever worked for, believed in, and died for is thrown overboard by people who pretend to believe in you. Poor Jesus! Even if you're a Pagan (like me), you can't help but feel a little bit sad for Him. Turns out His followers will overlook a whole lot of really bad behavior just for the vacuous promise of trying to overturn settled Supreme Court decisions.

Does any of this surprise you?

Well, this message has a (somewhat) happy ending. Upon hearing about this, quite a number of bored Goddesses spent the entire afternoon making macaroons from scratch for poor, sad Jesus. When it comes to understanding the perfidies of one's followers, no one can sympathize more than another deity.

I'm sure glad I lent my kitchen to the Goddesses for their baking. It smells heavenly -- and I can lick the bowls!

17 comments:

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Oh, I think Jesus got his followers' number quite a few centuries ago. But glad he got some yummy macaroons out of the deal!

baili said...

well come back to the world of blogging dear .
i came to visit you through Debra she who seeks.
best of luck for your great efforts for good causes.

Bob Slatten said...

Bill Maher had a great piece on the hypocrisy of evangelicals who have rallied behind a thrice-married adulterer as their champion.
"Baby Christian"? He's a full-grown panderer.

Plowing Through Life (Martha) said...

Oh, this made me laugh out loud!
Some people will get behind the devil himself if they feel their causes will be pushed forward. The hypocrisy is mind numbing!

Ol'Buzzard said...

If Donald Trump wasn't a real estate mogul he would be an evangelist preacher of a mega-church fleecing the flock.
the Ol'Buzzard

JACKIESUE said...

when I go to the store in Waco I pass this church that has a huge statue of Jesus with his arms out stretched..Barbara and I call it 'what the fuck Jesus.'...and it's really fitting now..and I'm sooooooooooo glad you are back.

Leeanna Henderson said...

I'm so glad you have come back. I'm in the middle of baking cookies and making rum cakes and other Yule goodies today. Trump is a real piece of work. He has such a following of sheeple that there is no turning them around. I dare say my poor dumb brother is one of those sheeple*sigh.*

Jono said...

Debra led me this way and I'm glad she did. Poor old Jesus really has to put up with a lot for his "children". Adding one more baby to the bunch would hardly be noticeable if he weren't such an outright ass.

Lucretia said...

::SNORT!!:: Love this post, hehehe, it made my day! And I'm glad to see you back, too. BTW, I think your "three followers" are multiplying!

mshatch said...

This is why I don't support organized religion, although I do support Jesus who would indeed be weeping to see Trump and his followers claiming to be Christians. The fact is, no true Christian would support a man who has said so many hateful things, and encouraged such divisiveness.

mary said...

OMG, why do people continue to overlook every warning sign from this guy and his mental instability?? I don't get it. Sometimes i think i might, but then logic overtakes me and i realize some of us need to get the heck of of the 3rd dimension--again!

Davoh said...

Um, Yeshua Ben Yoseph was never a 'god', simply a bloke who advocated 'simplicity' - and became annoyed by the Roman occupation of his homeland.
A sort of "Ghandi" in his time.

Davoh said...

Though before the wiccan ladies accuse me that all 'religion' is male based - think on this. The latin word mare mother ... also means 'the sea'.

Where did we all come from?..

From my point of view - the "mother" of us us all comes from the sea.
But yep, most of us live on, and within the "land". If the sea - 70% of this planet had any sort of "democratic" vote - would we not take it seriously?

Davoh said...

PS .. 'pagan' derives from the Latin - meaning "anyone outside the walls of Rome".
Me? am a happy pagan ...

Davoh said...

And yep, am male ... but before you judge me ... have researched 'religiosity' .. and still think that the suppression of wicca by the Romans in Constantine's time, and beyond, was ..... a setback for the ... humans.

Davoh said...

... and every other species on this incredibly beautiful planet.

Janie Junebug said...

I'm a Christian. I voted for Hillary Clinton--the person with more experience, intelligence, tolerance, and education. I consider it a decision based on logic, a quality that Donald Trump lacks in spades. There's nothing "Christian" about Trump's threats, nor his behavior. And I've never heard of this "baby Christian" bullshit.

Love,
Janie