Thursday, March 06, 2025

In Solidarity with Congressman Green

 Not gonna lie, “Gods Are Bored” buddies. I’m a stick shaker. I sometimes resort to colorful language as well, especially if the situation warrants it.

And if ever there was a situation where some sticks needed to be shaken, it was at the ridiculous 100 minute Blab by the Blob on Tuesday night.

I was not invited to this Address to Congress, and frankly, I am affronted by that. My independent nation, Johnsonia, is completely surrounded by the USA, and I benefit from some of that nation’s services. You would think that the U.S. government would be more gracious to a Head of State, even if her national borders are a quarter acre in New Jersey.

But if I had been there, I would have indulged in Bronx cheers, hand gestures, and, yes, stick shaking. The only Democrat who gets it is Congressman Green.

Times have changed. The Orange Menace—old, ugly, vulgar, and stupid as he is—has provoked a sea change in the USA. My students, most of whom are 17, have grown up with Trump as either president or a top candidate. This is what they have grown up seeing as presidential behavior.

Let that sink in for a minute.

The blustering, big-mouthed boaster is now our norm. Behaving with decorum only makes people look weak in the eyes of today’s young voters. Wearing pink and holding up little paddles? Really? Where is that getting you?

If I learned anything from 2017, it’s that pussy hats don’t cut it. It’s time to elect leaders who will call bullshit and shake sticks!

I’m sure one or two of you disagree. Heck, there are only one or two of you anyway! And it’s not like I would opt for hooliganism if everyone else was sipping tea. But the young people of the USA now have been weaned on ugly politics and the adoration of perhaps the most detestable human on the planet. They would not “get” affable Bill Clinton or Ronald Reagan. Presidents are supposed to be big and loud and combative!

Now is the time to meet this menace with some pushback from the other side.

So if some senior citizen congressman wants to vent his spleen, I am all for it! On a couple of notable occasions I have successfully smacked down attempts at bullying by big, loud men. Not by being cordial, either. Basically by shaking a stick.

Democrats, appoint some stick shakers! And then watch while they rise in politics because the young folks think this is what politicians do.

Not that any of this matters to me. I’m the Grand Wazoo of the Independent Republic of Johnsonia! Next Tuesday I will give MY State of the Union address. I hear the possum is planning to wear pink.

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