One of the oldest and most popular features of "The Gods Are Bored" is free advice. I've been doling out free advice for 12 years and sometimes even paying you to take it.
Today's free advice: Don't use your phone for any reason during a feature film in a movie theater.
If you do, you just might be sitting in an early showing of Rogue One, and you just might get a text that says, "Carrie Fisher died" during the first ten minutes of the film.
Then, by the end of the film, you might be weeping openly, throwing yourself on your seat mate, and limping out into the lobby wearing sunglasses.
So, do yourself a favor. When you go to see a movie, turn that phone off and don't dare to look at it until you are safely back in your automobile. The face you save could be your own.
Carrie Fisher: May she have found the Summer Lands. May the Goddess guide her. May she know peace.