Monday, December 09, 2013

Snow Day!

The words, the text, the phone call every school teacher wants to hear: "School is canceled due to inclement weather."

Remember when you were a kid, and you got a snow day? Off you went to sled, or build a snowman, and at least one parent had to stay home to take care of you ... so it was a win/win.

I'm a weather nutcase. I inherited it from my grandfather. I check the weather forecast at least twice a day, even when it's sunny. I watch the local news forecast, because that's the only place where the announcers give a more scientific explanation of the weather.

But everyone got this one wrong.

On Saturday, each and every forecast for my region called for a scant slushy coating of wintry mix, followed by a Noah's flood of rain. So when it started snowing on Sunday, no one thought it would last more than an hour.

It snowed like batshit all afternoon. By dinnertime we had seven inches and counting. The Philadelphia Eagles football game was highly entertaining when viewed from an armchair. Wouldn't have wanted to be in the stadium. Couldn't have seen the action from the nosebleed seats.

I'm glad I had the foresight to haul in a ton of firewood. But I didn't go to the grocery store.The cupboard was interesting ... challenging ... and I'm not a great cook in the best of times.

Of course, there are many, many weather geeks out there who took the forecast seriously. Therefore, when the real weather event arrived, these fine people were out in their cars, on the highway, going places. There were traffic accidents, and lots of them, jam-ups everywhere.

You would think that the world that has given us computers, cutting-edge health care, nuclear power plants and moon landings, would have made significant strides in weather forecasting. Just hasn't happened. Either they call for a blizzard and we get a scant coating, or they call for a scant coating and we get buried.

This time it was personal. I was ready with firewood but not with groceries. The infamy!

Cernunnos just popped by and tipped His helmet. He says that the bored gods have so little to amuse themselves with these days that They deliberately fuck up the weather forecast. He says to pay no mind to the vapid talking heads on the Weather Channel. The white stuff is in the hands of the bored gods. They dump it where They will.

And today I'm home, it's a snow day, and that's like a gift ...I never stopped being ten years old. Thanks be to the bored gods!

Now I'm off to check the weather forecast, in defiance of Cernunnos. Not a wise thing to defy that deity, as I have well learned. Maybe He'll give me a pass this time.


Lucretia said...

Here's something I learned growing up in San Francisco and watching the Channel 2 news every night at 10pm. Never trust the TV weather people. Their ouija boards DO NOT work. Seriously.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Weathere forecasting is an art, not a science, no matter how much they try to dress it up in scientific jargon. Enjoy your snow day!

Anti Kate said...

Cernunnos should not mind if you are watching the forecast mostly see where they go wrong and then to point and laugh.

Laura said...

I think the weather gods/goddesses just like to screw with the meteorologists. Nature's way of reminding us that she still has one up on us. :-)

ps...enjoy the snow for me! all we have is rain.

Anne Johnson said...

Ah, yes, Anti! Pointing and laughing! My favorite pastime! Ha ha! There's more snow in the forecast. Yeah, uh huh *snicker*.

Katie @ Horrific Knits said...

When the wind shifts just right I can smell Lake Erie from my apartment. I've learned to trust it more than what the weather people say (plus four years at a college so close to Lake Ontario that the water was the back yard of a great many of the dorms). I've learned to let Them do as they will and keep dried milk in the house.