Right up front I'll admit I've done a fair share of nude sunbathing, skinny dipping, and otherwise lolling by a waterside in a state of extreme undress.
The state of New Jersey, population 9 million, has one sanctioned nude beach. It has limited parking, and -- just look at the photo -- you have to trek about a half mile across blazing sands for the opportunity to
I visit this beach two or three times a year, and it's so refreshing! For one thing, what's wrong with the human body? It's nice. Mostly symmetrical, and nature loves symmetry. For another thing, what's wrong with enjoying looking at naked people? Of course you need to be polite and not get into someone else's personal space, but really.
The thing you learn from nude sunbathing is that everyone is beautiful. When you go to a nude beach, you're surrounded by a nice cross section of American humanity. It's refreshing. Since there aren't any other nude beaches, everyone who likes their clothing to be optional must gather in this one space. You get a real multicultural, multi-generational mix. And very few kids. Don't get me wrong, I love to watch kids have fun at the beach. But in these dark times, a nude beach isn't a very good hangout for the tots.
Here's where the frank talk comes in. Our society is so hung up on nudity that, when you get to go naked in public, you kind of want to act out. It's like having the keys to the ice cream truck. Now add the fact that the beach where I go does not prohibit alcohol. ZzzzzZZZZZttt! Sizzling stuff!
And then the iron fist falls.
It's legal to cavort nude on this beach with your strawberry daiquiri clutched in your palm, but it's against the law (with really ugly penalties) to have sex on the beach. I just don't get it. Anyone can stare at a computer screen and see people having sex, but ... wow ... actually see someone doing it for fun and not for profit? God (intentionally used as singular) forbid!
Don't tell anyone, but last summer when I was at the beach, I saw a couple breaking the law. I did not report the transgression, because honestly it looked like genuine fun to me. And it was realistic too! No exaggerations! That's how I like my salacious sex viewing ... three-dimensional, well-intended, and not performed with a viewer in mind.
There is one downside to nude sunbathing. It comes down to how thorough you are and how much attention you pay to detail. When you sunbathe nude, you've got a lot of skin exposed. (Duh.) If you lather on the sunscreen, and you miss a spot, you're going to get bad sunburn. Please don't ask me to provide chapter and verse on how I know this. Suffice it to say that I'm still wondering what I'll say to the dermatologist when I report my summer sunburn history.
So, on a night when a Category 4 hurricane is slamming into Texas, and our president continues his lunatic ways, I can only anticipate sticking my head in the sand while my glorious bare toosh goes on display for the world to see. Off to do some nude sunbathing! It does a body good.
7 comments:
You and My Rare One would make a good pair. She loves nude beaches too. She'll run around nekkid in public for any old excuse. When we were in Japan, all the public hot springs require nudity for use (segregated by gender though). She was in her glory.
Now, where was I during all this? Have I ever set foot on a nude beach? No. Was I soaking in my birthday suit in the Japanese hot springs? No. Will I even change out in the open in a women's locker room? No.
To each their own, I say. Have fun at the nude beach, Anne!
I'm for nude beaches; but no one would like to see some old fuck like myself running around free balling it.
the Ol'Buzzard
oh nooooooooooooooooooooo...nekkid bodies are not beautiful..no...unless your brad pitt or antonio banderas I'm not interested in nekkid bodies..noooooo
watch the tushie; you want to be able to sit down afterwards! ;-)
I've always thought that if I took off my clothes anywhere that a ripple of laughter would follow me everywhere I went. I'm too self-conscious for a nude beach, but if others want to indulge, then good for them.
Love,
Janie
If you really loved me you would invite me along. What's that you say? You hardly know me? My soul is crushed!
I did occasionally wander the shores of the Delaware Bay naked when I was a young lad. There was not a soul around and I loved the freedom I felt. I rarely wore more than a bathing suit anyway, so it wasn't much of a change. Unfortunately, my beach lifestyle has caught up to me in the form of the occasional basal cell carcinoma. All on my head and shoulders so far, so nothing important has been hurt.
Nude beaches are great. Democrats are the party of hate.
But nude beaches are great!
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