Thursday, May 30, 2013

Train Wreck Hatred

Well! A heat wave has settled over the Delaware Valley, and my eastern-facing classroom is now a balmy 85 degrees. But the school year is almost over. We've had a nice, cool spring.

Just now one of my students cut me a piece of cheesecake that he had made in Culinary Arts. Wow, it was delicious! It had some orange flavor somehow ... never had a cheesecake quite like it before.


We at "The Gods Are Bored" are limping into modern social media one misstep at a time. We now have a Facebook page, which is (I think) I can't double-check because I'm at school, and as you might imagine, school computers block Facebook.

Nor can I check the all-new "The Gods Are Bored" Twitter feed @TheGodsAreBored. Both of these platforms might come in handy if I actually do something interesting, which does happen every now and then.

In order to get started with Twitter, you've got to find some stuff to follow. I'm pretty boring, so I don't have a slew of t.v. shows or entertainers or politicians whose every word I hang on. I thought it might be good for some dudgeon if I "followed" the Westboro Baptist Church.

You know these morons par excellence. They need no introduction. They're probably one of the best things to happen to the modern American Pagan movement. Still, it's not worth it if a million people leave Chrisianity because of them. Which is a real possibility.

Geez, talk about haters! I've never seen such a thing. They tweet all day long, reveling in each and every disaster that befalls our nation, small and large. Pretty sophisticated Tweets, too, with links (which I don't follow) and pictures and the works. If I set myself the goal of hating, loathing, despising and abominating at the very peak of my energy, I couldn't even hate through the whole rest of my life the way these people do in a short afternoon.

Step aside, Galactus. You are no match.

If I think about it, I cannot find any fictitious villain as bad as the Westboro Baptist Church. Gotta turn to real life for that. In the context of human history, WBC doesn't even register on the radar. But ... who's with me in thinking that, if they somehow grasped the reins of power, they could rank right up there with Adolf and Josef? I totally see that possibility.

Basically, if you're out in your garden, and you step on an earthworm and crush it, that worm died because God hates fags. My dear kitty cat Alpha passed away a few months ago. Wow! I thought it was from old age. Turns out she died because God hates fags. (I guess God must love parrots, because Decibel is rocking on.)

Last night I went on Twitter, and there must have been a train derailment near Baltimore. Yes, you guessed it. That train went off the track because God hates fags. Everything, everywhere that goes wrong, even a little bit wrong ... even if it leads to the death of a single bacterium in the eyelid of a chubby, happy infant, that bacterium died because God hates fags.

So, who is the train wreck? God, or WBC?

Actually, though, if you flip-flop the logic, it's marvelous. Julian cut me a piece of cheesecake because the bored gods love fags. I saved a baby blue jay from the jaws of Beta cat because the bored gods love fags. Some sick child is just being told that she is going to get better ... because the bored gods love fags. The bored gods love fags! Yes, truthfully! This whole anti-homosexual business is a product of the Judeo/Christian mindset. Other cultures and their deities don't hate fags!

I'm not often on a computer that supports Twitter, but I think "The Gods Are Bored" could have a lovely, purifying presence on there if all I do is Tweet about happy stuff, credit the bored gods, and send it to the Westboro Baptist Church.

Ah, summer plans! Come one, come all, downsized deities ... let's have a Jellicle ball!


Vest said...

Seems these Yankee Babtist morons do not have midway humans within their families.
I wonder if it was possible for them to chant their 'No more Fags' Rant around the globe today, in order to promote International No Smoking Day. May 31 ?

bobby said...

Ok, I don't show up here often - but when I need a lift, hither I come..

& while I (thought I had) no use for tweeting, this is great!

"The Gods Are Bored" could have a lovely, purifying presence on there if all I do is Tweet about happy stuff, credit the bored gods, and send it to the Westboro Baptist Church.

Thanks for the 'lift'! ;-)


Helen/Hawk said...

Not gonna agree w/ you that the Westboro Baptist Church is "a product of the Judeo/Christian mindset."

Because there are many who follow Jesus path that are NOT of that ilk. Many more, tho sadly not as loud or as good at getting publicity.

That said, love this entry. And can see how if one is exposed directly to such vitriol that it's easy to jump [to conclusions] while jumping away in shock.