Thursday, October 19, 2017

Do You Know These Gods?

Out here in the Great Blue Northeast, an online resume company named is very popular. Job seekers can give your email to ZipRecuiter, and if you give a fuck really care about the seeker, you can leave a nice reference. Just this week I warmly endorsed a longtime colleague who is transitioning her career.

This can have its downside, though.

The first request I got yesterday was from EndodaWorld (see below). Apparently he saw an opportunity, pegged me as a sap, and put his bona fides online in search of praise and worship (and a hot shower).

Then this ashen deity must have recommended me as a hopeless sentimentalist to all his forgotten buddies. Today I was deluged with requests from ZipRecuiter. And the whole thing made me question the wisdom of my forebears regarding religious matters, let me tell you.

Do you know any of the following deities, and, if so, can you give me some deep background before I serve as a reference?

1. BigDiq

2. Shoutnstomp

3. Death Dodger

4. Tardigrade

5. Beelzebabble

6. Mister Softee

(Okay, just kidding about the last one. That's the ice cream truck.)

But for all I know, none of these deities is worthy even of driving an ice cream truck. Never heard of any of them! Why are they cheeky enough to reach out to me for a reference?

Inquiring minds want to know.


Debra She Who Seeks said...

All I know is that BigDiq had a completely unwarranted high opinion of himself.

anne marie in philly said...

mister softee COULD have been my ex-husband (ya never know).

but I DO remember the ice cream trucks back in the day; I can even hear the jingle in my head.

PS - "bigdiq" is donald dump looking for a new job!

Janie Junebug said...

Mister Softee could be BigDiq's real name.


Jono said...

Since I grew up near your neighborhood, Mister Softee is the only one I have ever heard of. It is, however, a terrible name for a guy. BigDiq sounds like a porn star. Lance BigDiq starring in She Likes it Big.


I for one do worship the ice cream truck that we have going thru West..along with the one that sells shaved ice with tiger blood ..

roth phallyka said...

All I know is that BigDiq had a completely unwarranted high opinion of himself.

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