Welcome to "The Gods Are Bored," where life without lawn gnomes is inconceivable!
I don't think we're gonna get to see the Monkey Man today, so here's a little free advice.
If you've got one of those low-cost gnomes that isn't made of plaster, and it loses a leg, here's what you do.
Find a solid stick, cut it about three inches longer than the height of the gnome, shove the stick up into the gnome's cavity, and then shove the extra three inches into the ground.
My gnome with a prosthetic limb is standing proudly among the throng, and no one would know the difference.
Never throw out a lawn gnome. We at "The Gods Are Bored" will adopt your unwanted gnomes no matter how pathetic they look.
FROM ANNE
THE MERLIN OF BERKELEY SPRINGS
