Always Loved Badges

Welcome to "The Gods Are Bored," polytheism for your soul and polyester for your sofa since 2005! We're dedicated to the notion that One is the loneliest number and that newer ain't always better. In fact, let's just trash that whole idea of "better." Two-thirds of what's wrong with this world is that people think their religion is better than the other guy's. How about this? The other guy's religion is different, not better. Vive la difference!

When I was a Girl Scout, I was in this gung-ho troop run by some Alpha Mom who never thought small. In those days we wore sashes, and we earned cloth badges that we would sew on our sashes. It was a point of pride to earn so many badges that you had to sew some of them onto the rear of the sash because they wouldn't all fit on the front. This Alpha Mom pushed us relentlessly, and we earned badges by the barge-load.

Would you believe I still have that sash? My daughter The Heir used it last year on Halloween. Don't ask for details.

I'm really hazy on how I earned all those badges, especially ones for art (can't draw) and international relations (never have been outside the USA). Probably about the only two I really deserved were the reading badge and the camping badge. Honestly, where I grew up, if you walked out on your porch you were practically camping, and since there's not much to do while camping, you read a lot.

All of this by way of saying that I got an email telling me I'd won this award for Best Pagan Blog, 2010. Okay, that's like a Girl Scout badge. I don't know what I did to earn it, I don't know how they found me, I don't know what it was they liked about me ... I don't even know who they are. Maybe it's that Alpha Mom Girl Scout troop leader again! Still out there hunting down badges for her babies. Thanks, Mom!

Anyway, the pretty trophy matches my blog color, and as my three regulars know, I'm very choosy about color schemes on my upholstered furnishings. So what the heck. This badge goes nicely with the background, and I'm told it's stain-resistant (two words I look for in anything I use).

The honor of a pretty new badge brings with it a short mission statement for "The Gods Are Bored," based on the ever-so-slight possibility that someone has wandered in without seeing the trailer.

Here at "The Gods Are Bored" we honor the ability of humans to perceive and connect with Higher Powers. We do not discriminate between the Higher Powers being praised and worshiped today and the Higher Powers that have been lost to the mists of time. Any and all deities are divine, whether they were painted on rock cliffs with ocher 30,000 years ago or pressed onto a t-shirt yesterday. In fact, we here at "The Gods Are Bored" make it a point to seek out the Ancient Ones and give Them a nod, because who is you to say They ain't holy?

Our other mission (please pass the plate) is to enliven this crazy world with a little bit of humor. The first medicine the gods gave us was shrooms .... emmmm .... yeah, well, the second medicine They gave us was laughter! And now there's a law against shrooms, but you can chortle, guffaw, snicker, roar and LOL to your heart's content. We're here to help with that.

Now that "The Gods Are Bored" has won a badge, we ought to have a pledge. The two are inextricably linked in my mind somehow. So here goes:

Place your pointer and middle finger in the air, wide apart. Smile.

"On my honor, I will try, to do my duty, to the bored gods and their countries, to help other people at all times, and to obey ........"

Obey. What should I obey? Stuck here. Let me think......

Got it!

"... and to obey the rules of the road."

We at "The Gods Are Bored" appreciate the award. Our operators are standing by to take your call.