Luna on the Lunar Landing
Welcome to "The Gods Are Bored!" Were you alive in 1969? Were you sober enough to mark certain milestones, like the lunar landing of Apollo 11 on July 20?
I was sober. I was still a kid. I'd always been interested in space exploration. While that lunar landing was going on, you couldn't have pulled me away from the old black-and-white t.v. with a pair of red-hot pincers.
One of the things I recall about the Apollo moment was that it occurred while a terrific thunderstorm was breaking outside. Later in the day, my dad was listening to a radio show, and a number of fundamentalist Christians called in to say that putting a man on the moon caused those thunderstorms, because God was angry.
Why God would choose to be angry at the Eastern Panhandle of West Virginia and not, say, the Delaware Valley, was beyond me ... even then.
However, recently I have discovered that the lunar landing did indeed anger a bored Goddess. She's here with me now to give a different perspective on the "one small step for man" thing. Please give a warm, wonderful, "Gods Are Bored" welcome to Luna, Great Goddess of the Moon!
Anne: Luna, what we celebrated as a huge scientific advance back in 1969 must have been catastrophic for you.
Luna: Oh yes, indeed! How would you like it if some male chauvinist astronauts came barging into your rock garden? "One giant step for mankind!" Phooey! They messed up my dust!
Anne: To say nothing of leaving behind the stars and stripes.
Luna: Oh, don't even get me started. If I had wanted a flag, I'd have created one. Something with a distinguished silver sheen. Not all that red, white, and blue. Tacky, I tell you. Tacky!
Anne: Please don't take this the wrong way, but I'm just wondering. What did You do when those astronauts crashed in and proved that the Moon is just a ball of rock, and not a Goddess?
Luna: Are you calling me a ball of rock, mortal?
Anne: Ummm. Ahhhh. Sorry?
Luna: You'd better be sorry. Next good eclipse, I'll arrange a cloud cover a mile thick over your house!
Anne: But, wasn't it a blow to Your ego when people really understood that the Moon is a satellite of Earth? How did You handle it?
Luna: First of all, the lunar landing wasn't the beginning of doubts about Me. First I had to give way to God. Then to the astronomers. Then to that ugly pod with feet, and the bouncy little men with their wired flag. It was a gradual thing.
Anne: So You adapted.
Luna: Yes indeed. I survived quite nicely. When is the best time to do Ritual work, or plant your tomatoes, or make resolutions?
Anne: Dark of the moon.
Luna: And what do Wiccans draw down?
Luna: Precisely! If anything, I'm not as bored as I used to be, through all those centuries of God the Father and Galileo. Things are on the upswing for Me.
Anne: Where do You hang Your hat? You still on the Moon?
Luna: I live in your life. When you look at the Moon, do you see a piece of rock that some men walked around on for a few days? Or do you see the gentle pattern of the months, the predictable ebb and flow of energy? When I'm dark, do you pray because you can't see a big piece of rock? When I'm full, do you dance because a big piece of rock looks pretty?
Anne: Very good points, Great Goddess. The divine is represented by Your beauty, by Your predictability, and by Your changing face. So ... ummm ... if I'm not asking too much ...
Luna: I feel a "no" coming on...
Anne: This thing with the tides. It gets on my last nerve. See, I grew up in the mountains, where the water runs downhill. I've never gotten used to this whole "high tide" thing. Creeps me out.
Luna: So you want me to cease and desist on tidal action.
Anne: Um, pleeeeeze?
Luna: Forget it. The tides are a "go." No one drags you kicking and screaming to the beach, do they?
Anne: Well, the only reason I don't kick and scream is that I would look silly. Frankly, I hate the beach. But I love You, Luna. You are fabulous.
Luna: Thank you, My child.
Anne: Can You stay around for supper? It's in the oven.
Luna: Maybe I will. What's in that jar over there in the pantry?
Anne: Moonshine. Want some?
Luna: Absolutely! To your health, dearest Anne!
Anne: Ummmmm..... Are you gonna .... Oh! She drank it all!