Special Statement from the Independent Republic of Johnsonia
In response to the 10% tariffs imposed by the Trump administration upon the Independent Republic of Johnsonia, our nation hereby will impose a 35% reciprocal tariff on the products exported by Johnsonia. Expect to pay more for white cat fur, pine needles, pinecones, carpenter bees, and milkweed seeds.
These tariffs will commence immediately.
We apologize for the hardship this will cause in the realm of international trade, but it is not a decision we arrived at lightly. We must do what is best for the citizens of Johnsonia.
Special statement by press secretary Taffy the Boardwalk Cat
April 5, 2025
Laugh or go mad.
