Friday, September 05, 2008

Anne is well

Anne has just called to tell me she is home, and seems in fine spirits. She still does not know quite when she will return here; so until then she has sentenced you all to more of me.

Here are some jokes to help take the sting out of your day.

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive.... so, I took her to a gas station..... and then the fight started.... ************************************************************************
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too' And then the fight started..... ***********************************************************************
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked,' Do you know her?''Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.' 'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?' And then the fight started..... ***********************************************************************
I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... he was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!!!' So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?' And that's how the fight started.....


Cheers!
/\Muin

7 comments:

yellowdoggranny said...

when's anne coming back?

Alex Pendragon said...

Don't listen to her....I was repeating these jokes to MY wife and could hardly contain my laughter. She herself even laughed at one of them!

I misunderstood......I thought Anne was getting a HIP REPLACEMENT! Guess not if she's back home this quick. Whatever, I hope she gets over whatever she had done in that aweful place soon. Give her my best.......I never could get her to pay for it.........

DDD said...

Tell Anne that the crazy poet from Gale stopped by to say hello. Yeah, the one and only...Dean!

BBC said...

I'm pleased to know that she is doing well, thanks for letting us know that.

Anonymous said...

Please convey my best wishes for a speedy non-KKKristian recovery to Ann.

And also, please pass this link to everyone you know.

http://therealmccain.com/butler/

democommie

Davoh said...

Anne's sense of humour and perception IS quite unique.

Thankyou Muin, for the effort, courage, for recyling the tiny tinkling bells at the gates of the fort.

yellowdoggranny said...

i tried to find the mccain link but wouldn't show up