Wednesday, February 28, 2007

The Buzzard Shaman Prepares to Suffer for Her Faith

Welcome to "The Gods Are Bored," the only place on the World Wide Web to find dancing vultures, cats that blog, and any and every god or goddess ever to grace the prayers of mortal humankind!

Is it a secret around here that Anne worships vultures? Ahem, you must be new to this site. Hey, welcome! Want a piece of pie?


We all know that to be a good missionary and proselytize properly, one must suffer.


I am ready to put my life and limb on the line for the Sacred Golden Purifier.


Two days ago I introduced you to the Buzzard Mascot outfit I plan to wear to the sold-out East Coast Vulture Festival. Isn't it fabulous?


Today the doggone thing arrived in the mail. It looks even more awesome in person (or I should say, "in buzzard"), but ... ah, you religious folks ... be careful what you wish for. You just might get it.


The head is made of fur. I can't breathe and see at the same time. The "feathers" weigh at least 40 pounds. Whoever made this thing was certainly creative. But that person must also have foreseen no indoor use for a buzzard costume. Once I get to the indoor activities (including the spirited shamanic dance), I am gonna collapse with heat stroke.


Yo, I'll deal, yo. Cuz u ain't 4 yr religion if u can b psyched.


If ancient Native Americans could go on Vision Quests and fast and suffer while awaiting a sign from their deities, I can honor the Sacred Golden Purifier by donning The Suit.


Yo, bring it on, yo.


FROM ANNE
THE BUZZARD OF WENONAH

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3 Comments:

At February 28, 2007 , Blogger Hecate said...

That is fucking awesome. May the Buzzard be with you!

 
At March 01, 2007 , Blogger Rosie said...

Are you serious! You are actually in possession of the giant buzzard costume!

May The Buzzard be with you!

(and also with you)

We lift up our hearts...

Okay..it starts getting squeamish there so I'll stop.

 
At March 02, 2007 , Blogger SCOTT said...

Anne, The Other day As I pulled out of my driveway and was slowly going down the road, what to my surprise did I get to see???
TWO OF THE BIGGEST BUZZARDS I HAVE EVER SEEN AROUND HERE!!!
I was totally overjoyed, as I was actually thinking of you just seconds before leaving the house when I did my daily bow to my Fairy Ball!! She is so beautiful in the morning sun. The buzzards flew across the road and landed in a tree beside the creek I have to cross as I leave my neighborhood!! It definitely was a good omen for me that morning, and I have been meaning to get here to tell you!! It was AWESOME!!!
YOUR SUIT IS THE DEAL,,, I KNOW YOU WILL BE A HIT!!
Can't wait for pictures,
Drink lots of fluids before hand!
Love you
Scott

 

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